Today has been 6 months since my sweet brother went to be with Jesus. I miss him.I most want to share with you is how Ben lived his life. He lived in humility and with great love. He experienced life with a humility that most of us can’t and won’t ever comprehend. Ben was made to be completely dependant on others for his survival and yet he lived his life with amazing grace. He was truly beautiful. And in his humility he loved me and many others with the purest love I believe I have ever and will ever experience on this earth. Benny loved people in the same way Paul talks about in 1 Corinthians,
I feel incredibly graced by the Lord that I got to grow up with Benny and understand, experience, and know such love from a young age. Ben’s life has always drawn me to praise the Lord because I see God’s beauty, majesty, and mystery all wrapped up into who Benny was. And now in hind sight I can see how the Lord has been preparing me for this moment my entire life. God gave me the grace at a young age to not only receive and be conscious of Benny’s love for me, but also the Lord allowed me to love him back with the purest love I believe I have ever given. I can remember those afternoons as a little girl, cleaning my room, alone with Benny, the music playing and him chewing on something off the floor…and sometimes in those moments we spent together I would become overwhelmed by the love I had for Benny… and I would sit on the floor next to him, pull him into my lap, so that we were face to face with his legs wrapped around me. I would sit there and hold him close and then rock back and forth quietly telling him how much I loved him. Now as I look back on those times… I realize that it was God’s enabling grace since I was just a kid. Because of those kinds of moments with Benny I have no regrets. I know Ben knew how much I loved him…and I always knew how much he loved me. Benny was a picture of love to me. So today as we honor Benny’s life, as his big sister, the one thing I hope and want you all to remember about my brother is his love.
I feel incredibly graced by the Lord that I got to grow up with Benny and understand, experience, and know such love from a young age. Ben’s life has always drawn me to praise the Lord because I see God’s beauty, majesty, and mystery all wrapped up into who Benny was. And now in hind sight I can see how the Lord has been preparing me for this moment my entire life. God gave me the grace at a young age to not only receive and be conscious of Benny’s love for me, but also the Lord allowed me to love him back with the purest love I believe I have ever given. I can remember those afternoons as a little girl, cleaning my room, alone with Benny, the music playing and him chewing on something off the floor…and sometimes in those moments we spent together I would become overwhelmed by the love I had for Benny… and I would sit on the floor next to him, pull him into my lap, so that we were face to face with his legs wrapped around me. I would sit there and hold him close and then rock back and forth quietly telling him how much I loved him. Now as I look back on those times… I realize that it was God’s enabling grace since I was just a kid. Because of those kinds of moments with Benny I have no regrets. I know Ben knew how much I loved him…and I always knew how much he loved me. Benny was a picture of love to me. So today as we honor Benny’s life, as his big sister, the one thing I hope and want you all to remember about my brother is his love.
My sweet children-
ReplyDeleteBlessed beyond measure-
My cup runneth over-